my therapy sessions........................

There is absolutely nothing better to me than simultaneously playing tennis and purging my soul to my best friend. And today, that is exactly what I did. I didn't get..............no that isn't correct.............I didn't allow myself the opportunity to do anything for myself over the summer. I love taking care of the kids(and Kirk, for that matter), but everyone needs a chance to vent a little. So tennis in the mornings after dropping the kids off at school, is "my time". But, in all honesty...................I don't have much to complain about. I'm actually a boring kind of girl. There isn't a whole lot of drama that happens in my life. I get excited over new recipes..............I love hearing all the latest gossip from my teenager when she comes home from school, I read books ALL the time and miss my husband tremendously when he's on graveyard. And because I don't work, my days tend to blend into the next. But, in-between those boring moments...................life, love, laughter and tears happen. And besides my husband, I look forward to sharing these comical, serious & heart wrenching tales with my friend. She knows me so well that within a few sentences she can tell if something is bothering me. And I feel I know her equally well too. I tend to be quite a talker and sometimes it's in complete circles. But, I honestly talk to very few people. And the down side of that for these people is that once you get me started, it's hard to get me to stop. I cry easily, but usually don't share why. I keep it all bottled up inside myself and sometimes sharing it with Kirk just isn't enough. And don't tell him I said this, but sometimes it's Kirk that's bothering me. Mandy and I call this our "therapy sessions". And that's exactly what it is for me. I feel lighter, less burdened after one of our "therapy sessions" and ironically, not one thing has changed except that I've let a few things go that were bothering me and altered my perception on others. I am lucky to have a friend that doesn't try to change me. Instead, she helps me see another version of situations and myself that I may not see. I guess the best part is that she's always on my side. Don't get me wrong, we disagree on things all the time. And we don't always see things eye to eye, but that doesn't mean she's not on my side or doesn't trust my judgment. Having someone I can honestly tell the whole truth to, without judgment is a rare thing for me. Yea, she might tease me about something stupid or silly that I did, but that's ok. With most people, I tend to leave out embarrassing parts or parts that may make me sound like the bad guy. I don't do that with her because it doesn't matter. To her, I'm just me. The Becky that is boring, outrageous, hysterical, absurd, OCD, hilarious, lonely, sad, embarrassed, furious and happy. The same Becky that makes very many mistakes and it's very comforting knowing that, just being me..........................faults and all....................is still ok.